Thursday, August 20, 2009

Part 5: Let the marriage proposals begin!


Bessie at 18, with dimples flashing
and dark chocolate eyes all a-sparkle.


















In the 1930's Bessie was a teenager.
According to the back of the picture on the right, she is 17 (1933) sporting the 'Marcel' hair style. It is unknown if this is the first time she wore the Marcel style, or even if she liked it. What we do know is that at age 17, she received her first marriage proposal.

The following are her own words about the proposal.

"We had a missionary in 1933 who had come from Arizona, his name was Seth Wright. Seth was a big man and very nice. When he had gone home, he started writing to me and at Christmas time he sent my brother Joy a pair of leather Indian gloves and a present to each of us girls. One of us got a silver dollar. We had never seen a silver dollar before. I don't remember what he sent me. He and I would write back and forth, and he sent me pictures of him at work at the power plant in Arizona. Then a letter arrived asking me to marry him. Dumb me, I liked his letters, but this one asked me to marry him. I said to my Grammie, "I'm only 17, I don't want to get married!"
Her wise Grammie answered, “Well Bessie you will have to write and tell him you're not ready, but be careful how you word it."


Bessie seldom wore pants
so this picture is a rare find.
Even in pants, she remained fashionable and feminine. I have no doubt that she was color-coordinated.




I'm not sure exactly where in New Brunswick these pictures were taken, but Bessie was in Canada visiting her Giberson relatives. 

Bessie's preferred clothing was always a dress.
Even while behind a horse
or dressing up as a cowgirl











Bessie Amelia Small






Bessie





when she went on a trip to Canada with the LDS sister missionaries.



Bessie and sister, Laurel


Bessie with Valeda, who remained 
the shortest of the Small sisters at 4'9"
















JJ Newberry's counter where Bessie worked

Bessie at work
behind the counter at J.J. Newberry's.









         

Though always a lady, she had very strong feelings of right and wrong and was not afraid of confrontation if someone crossed that line. One time, a jealous co-worker messed up the merchandise on Bessie's pristine counter and refused to return it to its proper order at Bessie's firm request. Bessie took matters into her own hands

Before the co-worker knew what was happening, she found herself pinned to the floor by the tiny dynamo until she agreed to correct her mistake. The manager, Mr. Meridian,
walked by during this altercation and merely nodded at Bessie, and continued on his way. Smart man.

Bessie's pay envelope


< Here is a pay envelope from the time Bessie worked at J.J. Newberry's. She received $3.52 for a week pay period.





 November 1938 





Bessie 


Bessie was totally committed to her faith. Like all else in her life, she lived it with passion and deep-seated belief. She was unwilling to accept marriage to anyone who was not a return-missionary.

In her words: "We (3) girls had always planned to go west when we were older, to find a return missionary and get married. We couldn't find any back in Maine, because we were the only Mormons around where we lived. We would go to bed at night and lay in bed and tell stories of going west we called it "AND SO...”. We were always going to Ogden, Utah."


Kenneth Hacking
Her sister Laurel met her future husband, Kenneth Hacking, while Kenneth served an LDS mission in Maine. This is what she told me about it:


"Elder Hacking came to our mission from Archer, Idaho, south of Rexburg. He had been in the mission about 22 months and got up the courage to tell his Mission President that he had fallen in love with Laurel Small. The president asked if they had kissed or had he talked to Laurel about it?

Elder Hacking said "No."


He was told to talk to the grandmother, Sister Maud Small, who was a wise and understanding woman. He did and come to find out Laurel had told Grammie (Maud Small) how she felt about Elder Hacking. Grammie and Grampie were happy. Laurel went west to find Elder Hacking and meet his family and got a job working in JC Penny’s in Rexburg for several months. Then they went to Salt Lake and married in the Salt Lake Temple."

All missionaries carried a card
with their name and address
Note: Eileen Lentz (Laurel's daughter) was kind enough to provide the following information: My father actually told his first mission president about his feelings for Laurel early on in his mission expecting he would be transferred. However, his mission president left him there, as did his second mission president, for the rest of his mission. A few months before his mission was completed, the mission president told Kenneth it was about time he asked Laurel to marry and said he felt a discrete courtship was in order. She had no idea that he had these feelings for her before he asked her if she wanted him to be "her lord and master," and she said "I guess so." Then he patted her on the head. When he went home, she traveled with him, along with a couple that were traveling west to visit their son. My father had given a priesthood blessing to the husband as he lay dying, and promised him he would live to visit his son in the West. The next day when the doctor came to sign the death certificate he found his patient sitting up at the table with a big grin on his face. Traveling with Kenneth and Laurel to the West was the ultimate epilogue of his story. My father told me that one of his proudest days was when the mission president announced their engagement to the other missionaries and said, "See, romance can still blossom when you are keeping the mission rules."



Laurel Maud Small Hacking




Here Laurel is sitting on a blanket with an Idaho potato - yes, the potato is real and yes, they can get this big and bigger. It looks like snow is on the ground, but the photo isn't clear enough to determine time of year. The fact she has no sweater or coat could mean it's spring, but it does snow - frequently - in Idaho in October.
Frank Woodbury Sprague
Bessie refused his proposal









Return missionaries were more rare than hen's teeth in Bangor and Bessie had promised herself that she would marry one. She had already refused two more proposals (non-members this time) Frankie Sprague and Dick Emery.

It was not an easy decision, but she knew to keep the promise she made herself, that she would have to leave home. In her words: "In 1939, I make my plans to go west." In another letter she wrote: "I went west to live with Laurel and find work and a returned missionary I could fall in love with. Kenneth and Laurel had written me telling me Norman Erickson had returned from a mission and he saw my picture and wanted to go out with me when I came west."

Grampie Small
(William "Bill" Small)
April of that year Grampie Small told her, "Bessie you can go, but wait till I go (die) it won't be long."

On 14 June 1939, he graduated from this life.

In that day and age, bodies were displayed in the family parlor and mourners came to the house.

Bessie spent part of that sad day eluding a persistent man who wanted to become better acquainted with her. When she told her Grammie, she was told the man was "...just lonely".

Even after all those years, I could still see Bessie thought the man's behavior disrespectful. I'd like to think that Maud's answer would have been different if she had not just lost her husband.

No comments: